6.5.15

Thank you #561


Daily painting #561 6"x8" oil on primed canvas panel

Well it has taken me a whole month to get daily painting #561 painted! I have never been so happy to squeeze paint out of tubes and picking up my brushes was like taking the hand of your child into your own hand and feeling that instant connection to the very core of your being! I momentarily forgot about a leg that was now throbbing from hobbling along on the crutches to get to my studio! I was initially frustrated as with both hands on crutches I couldn't carry the things I needed or get to certain things but where there is a will, there is a way! It is amazing what you can carry in the grips of your jaw when you can't use your hands! Once I was finally seated at my little wooden daily painting box I had demons sitting on my shoulder. I haven't painted for a month (feels like a lifetime) so the internal dialogue went something along the lines of "maybe I won't be able to....maybe I should just not do this....what if I just can't paint today...." If you are a painter or artist or even a writer, you will be able to relate to all the insecurities that rumbled through my head as I stared at that little 6"x8" rectangle of glaring white board! But once I picked up that brush...it just felt right!
This is no perfect little painting and many of my daily paintings are not master pieces and are never created with that aim in mind. They are about the process of doing, of applying paint and the joy it gives me, the ritual of recording something ordinary in a short space of time for the sheer pleasure the interaction gives me. Daily painting for me is never about creating magnificent paintings. It's about me and my paint and the silly little daily objects or stories that make up my every day. It's a meditative daily ritual and I have missed it like crazy! Today I have never been so happy to sit at my little wooden painting box! The good news is that my ankle will not require surgery but the break has not yet healed and there is severe tissue damage to tendons and ligaments on both sides which is why I still have no movement in my foot. But with time, this will heal. I am able to move around more at home with the help of crutches (and a willing husband to help me downstairs) and the doctor has said no teaching until June. But with a little effort I can make it to my studio and that is a fabulous start!
I have been so overwhelmed by the generosity of family, friends and art students who have helped with my children, dropped off meals, cakes and flowers and the overwhelming amount of messages I have received has been heartwarming. I wish I could thank you all personally but for now today's daily painting carries a message of thanks to you all! Healing happens one day at a time....and starting the day with a little painting was a step in the right direction! Thank you friends x

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